One foot in front of the other

With the physical strain of my period on top of grieving, I was so exhausted when I came home last night that I could barely stay sitting up. I slept for ten hours, solid. I’m too worn out to even cry.

Everyone keeps telling me how strong I am, but that’s not how I feel. Quite the opposite. I feel too weak, too tired to do anything but just stumble through each day, putting one foot in front of the other, numbly completing each routine task.

Each night when I go to bed, I congratulate myself on having survived another day. I think about what needs to be done the next day, what reason I have for getting out of bed at all. I can’t bear to look any further ahead than that.  One day, one hour, one moment at a time…

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~ by hourbeforedawn on March 21, 2010.

3 Responses to “One foot in front of the other”

  1. but that is strenght…one foot in front of the other. No one feels great during times like this-not everyone gets up and plows on, even when it sucks. you are STRONG just for surviving another day.

  2. I agree with Brandi, you are strong because you are getting out of bed in the morning. You are doing the routine stuff that needs to be done. You are getting through minute by minute, hour by hour. That shows your strength. Love you. Sending you love and more strength.

  3. Sweetie that is grief. And know the first’s will be the hardest. the first hour, day week, month, year, anniversary, holidays – they will be the hardest, but they get easier with time. I do guarentee that to you. Unfortuately grief never fully goes away. But it can become an ally to you. You know I share this from experience. My heart is with you.

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