Moths

I dreamed that my living room was suddenly filled with very large white-winged moths. It was raining outside – I could hear it pounding against the roof and the windows – and the wind was howling. The moths seemed to appear out of nowhere and were all over the windows and the walls. Someone who was with me told me they were “Lauren moths.” When they all started to fly at once, their wings rustled like paper. A bunch of them flew straight at me, landed on me.

I  grabbed them by the handfuls and rushed to the balcony door, throwing them outside. When I opened the screen door, all but one of the moths flew out. I was looking at the one remaining moth through the screen, from the outside, and I could see that she had a woman’s face.

I awoke from the dream at 3:30 a.m. It felt important and symbolic, so I went to the computer and googled it. As you might expect, the symbolism of a moth is similar to that of a butterfly – the transformation from one state of being to another. The difference is that moths are nocturnal. According to one website, “Night creatures conduct their life-sustaining activities in complete darkness.” Moths symbolize the use of dreams, awareness, and deep inner knowing to navigate through the darkest hours of our lives. They indicate a strong influence by the power of the moon.

There’s no variety of moth called a Lauren Moth, so I looked up the meeting of the name Lauren. It means “crowned with laurel leaves,” symbolizing victory.

Well, right on.

The butterfly has been my personal symbol of transformation for the better part of the last decade, ever since I found the courage to walk away from a toxic, codependent relationship where I was controlled through head-trips and shared delusions. I transformed myself from a frightened, crawling caterpillar to a beautiful butterfly. In the sunshine of Mike’s love, I blossomed. (Yes, I know I’m mixing metaphors.)

The moth is SUCH an apt symbol for this current phase of my life journey, I’m wondering if that’s why I never got around to getting the butterfly tattoo I kept talking about. Maybe it should be a moth instead, with great white wings and a woman’s face. And I think I’ll have it done on the anniversary of Mike’s death… make that the anniversary of his transformation from one state of being to the next.

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~ by hourbeforedawn on April 12, 2010.

8 Responses to “Moths”

  1. Lira, beautiful writing as always. I am always in awe of how self-aware you are, and how in tune you are with your dreams and messages they are sending you. I think a moth tattoo could be perfect.

  2. What an awesome awesome dream!! Wow!

  3. I believe as you do concerning Michael and his transformation. My clues came in the form of written messages and symbols. I prayed for him to find God but not as it turned out. He is at peace now.

  4. What a beautiful dream, Lira! My dreams have been powerful lately too, and I believe strongly in the power of the subconscious to speak to us and heal us. In these difficult times, we can find reassurance in knowing that the Big Consciousness (whether you call it God or Spirit or All There Is or whatever) is moving in and through us…IS us!

  5. Wait ’till you see the art for my show. It will be up in a day or so. Synchronicity Time! (except mine is a Monarch).

    Luv to you…

  6. This is powerful stuff Lira. also about Clarity. I think transformative dreams are common when we are in a state of trauma or in mssive change. You can step into your dream and make changes. Some that I made have permanently changed my life reality. XXXWahinkpe Wahwala(Gentle Arrow)

  7. […] six weeks after Mike died, I had a dream about moths that felt very significant (https://hourbeforedawn.wordpress.com/2010/04/12/moths/). I started thinking then about a moth tattoo and I did some research into different types of […]

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